Thursday, June 16, 2011

Pri's "Thai" Fried Rice


I was taking a stroll in the jungle one day and all of the sudden, a guerrilla chef and his pet gorilla jumped out in front of me.

The guerrilla chef said "Hey kid, eat this rice!" and his pet gorilla started growling. So I ate the rice and it was delectable!

I asked the guerrilla chef, also known in the normal world as Pri, to please please please give me his recipe and below was what he sent me:

1 cup jasmine rice
1/2 lb MEAT
1/8 of butter stick
1/2 tsp garlic
2 tbsp red curry paste
1 lime
1 tbsp sugar?
1/2 med can of coconut milk
2 tbsp fish sauce
2 tbsp soy sauce (mushroom)
5-6 thai basil leaves
7 thai chiles if you want to light your anus on fire

1. make your rice, and mix the coconut milk & curry paste in a separate bowl
2. at medium-high heat, butter your pan.
3. brown the garlic in the butter.
4. throw the meat in, cook it partly through
5. add the milk & paste mix - and cook for 5min? reduce the mix basically
6. mix in rice, add the fish & soy sauce, sugar, and squeeze the lime in
7. mix in your vegetables (including the basil/chiles) and thats it
8. light your hand on fire

I forgot to mention the egg

Simple enough, right? Yup, I decided to make it myself.

I made about 1 1/4 cup (the cup that comes with your rice cooker) of rice. I only fill the water up to the 1 cup mark. Why? Because I learned from my mom that when making fried rice, it's better to start with really dry rice so your end product won't be too soggy.

I got all of the ingredients and more! I also got water chestnuts and pineapples.

Clockwise from the top, a.k.a. the 12 o'clock position:

1 stalk of green onion - sliced
leaves from about 3 sprigs of sweet Thai basil
3 cloves of garlic - chopped
a hunk (about 1/4 of the can) of Thai red curry paste
3 slices of pineapples from a can - cut into bite size pieces
about 5 peeled water chestnuts - chopped
5 Thai chili peppers - chopped (I didn't want my anus on fire)
16-18 shrimps - cut into small pieces

Oh yeah, it was pretty!

In a large pan, I melted a hunk of butter. Added the garlic and stirred until the garlic was all nice and bronzed!

I stirred the chunk of red curry paste with a little bit less than 1/2 can of the 13.5 fl oz can of coconut milk. This is a mistake, by the way! I should have added more coconut milk.

Poured that curry paste and coconut milk mixture into the butter and garlic pan. Noted that the original guerrilla recipe called for adding meat (i.e. chicken, pork) right about now. Since I decided to use shrimps only and shrimps cook really fast, I decided to just reduce the sauce without adding any meat/shrimps to it.

Instead of just adding sugar and fish sauce, I decided to be a pair of fancy pantaloons and added 2 tablespoons of the pad thai sauce from the recipe Helen sent me a while back. I made this ahead of time and saved it in the fridge. This way, pad thai flavor is always available! Helen is a genius!

I poured in about 2 tablespoons of the Pearl River mushroom soy sauce. Two things: 1)Yeah, I actually went out and spent $1.69 for a new bottle of soy sauce instead of just using what I had already. I figured that I like mushrooms, so an investment in mushroom flavored soy sauce is not a bad thing; 2)the beauty of this reduction step is that you can taste the sauce during this time and adjust as necessary.

About 1/4 of a lime was squeezed in. I know, I know, in that photo it looks like I'm squeezing in half a lime but it was only because I was lazy and didn't want to cut off 1/4 of a lime for a photo.

Sauce bubbling on medium-low heat. This is a good time to keep tasting the sauce because 1)it's utterly delicious and 2)adjusting with more lime/soy sauce/fish sauce/sugar until all taste buds are satisfied.

Time to dump in the vegetables and shrimps!

Okay, see those green onions about to take a dive into the bubbling cauldron of goodness? Don't do that! I did it and realized that I was a giant dumb ass. If you want to avoid having the pretty onions disappeared into the final mixture like me, save them green onions for the end.

Anyway, I stirred those things around for about 30 seconds until the shrimps are somewhat cooked.

The bone dry rice was then added to the sauce pan. Ready to soak up heaven, rice? Yup! Ready!

Stir stir stir! I added two eggs to the pan and stirred some more to incorporate the eggs.

Because I was dumb and added the green onions with the rest of the vegetables, the end product was lacking some colors, so I added 1/4 cup of peas and cooked that for about a minute.

If you saved the green onions, add them in before serving and stir a few times for an even distribution of colors.

Et, voila!

I think this dish should be called a "Thai" dish loosely because I don't know if actual Thai people make this or I'm just throwing in Thai ingredients (Thai curry, Thai chilies, Thai basil, coconut milk, and pineapples).

Helen also made a version of this. I hope she will post it, too. If not, I will ask her for permission to post a photo of what she made.

Oh, I didn't light my hand on fire like step #8 in the original recipe suggested because it would be kinda hard to take a picture while my hand is on fire.

Edit: Learn from Pri's experience, wash your hands really really well after handling the chili peppers and before removing your contacts. If you heed this advice, you will suffer greatly!

Guerrilla chef: Someone who says "Fuck recipes! I'm going to make up my own food!" The guerrilla chef in this story is not really a chef in real life because he kept saying "But I'm not a chef..."


  1. lol. Nice additions! Pri's "Thai" fried rice is so versatile! :D

    Here's a less blurry photo than the one I sent you:


    I switched it up with mangos, red bell peppers, and onions. Way less outrageous than yours!

  2. Mangoes is totally what I'm gonna do for this dish! I <3 bell pepper too! I always have chicken on hand :P will be trying this recipe this weekend! (just need red curry paste :P)